Thursday, November 19, 2009

Power

A lot of the drama we've been dealing with the last couple of days has stemmed from the beginnings of George's search for independence:

Told to wear a coat on a windy day = full meltdown in the school hallways.

Told to brush his teeth before school = full meltdown in the living room.

Told to walk with me, not run ahead = full meltdown in the school parking lot. (It's somehow both embarrassing and wonderful that all of his aides and teachers knew what was going on before we even made it in the building, as the principal had radioed in to them. They stepped in and took over with complete calm and confidence.)

Told to quit poking at his sister while she was getting dressed = well, both of them were poking, so that turned into quite a lot of yelling from all of us.

There are so many things that kids are told to do throughout the day. Our days are always very structured, both kids respond well to knowing the plan for the day. But the little restrictions, rules, and corrections that occur all day long must get tiring. Especially when you're an active little guy, anxious to do everything independently. (He stopped holding my hand shortly after school started this fall. Ripped my heart to shreds!)

So much of what I was dealing with was really a power play. I had it, he wanted it. So yesterday after school, I started paying attention (about time, huh?) and changing how I wield that power.

Instead of telling him to put on his coat after school, I brought a sweatshirt with me and allowed him to choose which one to put on. He chose the coat, and put it on without a fuss.

Instead of telling him it was time to brush his teeth, I asked him to go "wake up Wall-e" (his toothbrush has Wall-e on it, and is stored in the medicine cabinet). He ran to the bathroom, yelling, "Good morning, Wall-e! It's time to get up and brush teeth!"

I still reminded him that we had to walk together as we went in to school, but I allowed him to lead Emma & I in games: like walking in a line, pretending to be a train; or having him tell me when I should duck down to walk beneath tree branches, and then exaggerating the movements.
While they were getting dressed this morning, instead of doing chores, I sat down on the floor beside them. I was able to keep Emma moving, deflect skirmishes before they got going, and help keep the energy calm and happy. I give Emma a lot of credit for that, too. I asked her to help me maintain a peaceful morning and she did a great job.

We had a great morning.

Every time we go through a rough spot with George, there's always a reason. And usually, if I pay attention, it's obvious. We just have to find our way through.

IMG_1866
Happy Love Thursday

11 comments:

Beth said...

Then can you come here and solve some of our problems? You seem to be on a role and I could use some help!

You are such a good, creative mom. And I think that is the secret. Creativity!

Melanie said...

Oh, no Beth, she comes to me first! Meg, you truly are a great mom. Actually you posting that made me realize that maybe Liam ISN'T trying to drive us completely bonkers. Thanks! Now, how about after Thanksgiving? You can come to NC, right? LOL!

loonyhiker said...

You are doing such a wonderful job! I found out that allowing my students to make choices really made a difference in classroom management. I think children of all ages feel like they have so little control in their lives that they fight for every little bit of control that they can. Thanks for inspiring me to write a blog post about this for teachers. :)

Tanya @ TeenAutism said...

You figured it out like the pro that you are! And I love the photo to go with the post - perfect.

Ali said...

Loved this post Megan :). Sounds so very familiar.

kpn2010 said...

性功能障礙 ,陽萎 ,陽痿 ,生物科技 ,壯陽 ,男性疾病 ,性功能 ,韭菜籽 ,起陽籽 ,高血壓 ,外遇 ,徵信 ,徵信社 ,外遇 ,外遇 ,徵信社 ,徵信 ,徵信社 ,外遇 ,徵信 ,徵信社 ,失眠 ,安養中心 ,老人癡呆症 ,疝氣 ,看護 ,情緒管理 ,微整型美容 ,精神分裂症 ,憂鬱症 ,瘦身減肥 ,baby ,月子餐 ,孕婦 ,生產 ,坐月子 ,坐月子中心

kpn2010 said...

坐月子餐 ,到府坐月子 ,產後護理 ,新生兒 ,孕婦 ,月子餐 ,更年期 ,玻尿酸 ,婦產科 ,醫學美容 ,月子中心 ,坐月子中心 ,美白 ,飛梭雷射 ,水餃 ,台北素食餐廳 ,吃素 ,素食 ,素食水餃 ,素食餐廳 ,健康飲食 ,團購美食 ,包裝設計 ,伴手禮盒 ,紀念品 ,茶葉 ,禮品 ,茶葉禮盒 ,雷射雕刻 ,伴手禮 ,禮品公司 ,贈品 ,玫瑰花束,花店,盆栽

kpn2010 said...

氣球佈置,婚禮佈置,情人花束,新竹花店,會場佈置,網路花店,蘭花,木柵動物園,台北民宿,台北旅遊,坪林,坪林茶葉博物館,宜蘭民宿,真情民宿,深坑老街,貓空,太平山,宜蘭民宿,宜蘭旅遊,水餃 ,團購美食 ,水管不通 ,抽化糞池 ,洗水塔 ,消毒 ,馬桶 ,馬桶不通 ,通水管 ,通馬桶 ,上順旅行社,大興旅行社,五福旅行社,天喜旅行社,天福旅行社,日本自由行

kpn2010 said...

日本訂房,日本機票,CI設計 ,FPR大型公仔製作 ,大圖輸出 ,空間設計 ,活動行銷 ,展場設計施工 ,會場佈置 ,節慶佈置 ,道具製作 ,櫥窗佈置 ,水管不通 ,包通 ,抽化糞池 ,抽水肥 ,洗水塔 ,馬桶 ,馬桶不通,清水溝 ,通水管 ,通馬桶 ,二手車,中古車,抽水肥 ,通水管 ,通馬桶 ,肉毒桿菌 ,玻尿酸 ,美容美白 ,健檢 ,淨膚雷射 ,電波拉皮 ,韓風整形 ,醫學美容 ,體檢 ,加盟

kpn2010 said...

加盟創業 ,早餐店加盟 ,創業 ,創業加盟 ,禿頭 ,玻尿酸 ,美白 ,減肥 ,痘疤 ,雷射溶脂 ,電波拉皮 ,皺紋 ,醫學美容 ,104法拍網 ,大台北法拍屋 ,台北法拍屋 ,房屋仲介 ,房屋買賣 ,板橋法拍屋 ,法拍 ,法拍屋 ,法拍屋查詢系統 ,信義房屋 ,肉毒桿菌 ,抽脂 ,玻尿酸 ,飛梭雷射 ,淨膚雷射 ,植髮 ,微晶瓷 ,雷射溶脂 ,電波拉皮 ,醫學美容診所 ,truss

kpn2010 said...

大圖輸出 ,展示架 ,展場設計 ,展覽設計 ,海報架 ,海報設計 ,會場佈置 ,會場設計 ,廣告設計公司 ,桃園土地 ,桃園房屋 ,桃園房屋仲介 ,桃園房屋買賣 ,桃園房屋網 ,珠寶 ,黃金 ,結婚 ,鑽石 ,鑽戒 ,皮膚科 ,皮膚科診所 ,肉毒桿菌 ,肉毒桿菌瘦臉 ,柔膚雷射 ,玻尿酸 ,飛梭雷射 ,脈衝光 ,除斑 ,casino gaming machine ,gaming machine manufacturer ,gaming machine